1. People who include Evan’s name with our names in cards, notes, letters and such. He is and always will be a very integral part of our family. Do not leave him out please.
2. Waking up every morning and being able to see the beauty that surrounds me.
3. Being sick and feeling lousy, but thankful to know that it is temporary and I will be up and running in no time. (Got a good case of the creepy crude right now)
4. Having friends that I can bitch and moan to about people and circumstances in life who just allow me to vent without judging me or feeling like they have to play the devil’s advocate. While I try to fight it every day, I am human and very aware of my faults and flaws.
5. My husband and kids. All of us who have lost children know that without them we would have no motivation to exist. We all can’t imagine how our friends without other children do it. So thankful that two young couples who lost their only children when we lost Evan have adopted or are pregnant now. There is always worse loss than our own, unfortunately
6. Knowing my God has carried me through this tragedy and has allowed me to have great perspective about my temporary human life vs. my eternal life.
7. That through my own suffering I have adjusted how I plan to spend the rest of my life on this earth. I will never forget what I have witnessed from the moment of Evan’s diagnosis on May 1, 2007.
8. The gift of strength and determination that I was born with, some call it bitchiness. Without it I would not have been given the great gift of the cause and been able to be part of saving lives, the good part, while dealing with all the bullshit surrounding it. If I were any less of a person I would have thrown in the towel long ago.
9. Thankful for every single movement people have made to love and support us from the moment of Evan’s seizure on that pool deck through today. Some of these movements very vivid, others I will never know about, but I do know it takes a village to help a family through tragedy and we have an amazing village.
10. To those of you who didn’t need to hear “thank you” or “I’m sorry”, as even now almost 4 years from the day our lives turned upside down, I am still incapable of tying up those loose ends in my life. I am still way far from being perfect, but happy to know that someday I will achieve that state of being.
More thoughts to come, g
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